Oh Puhleeze!!! Wake up to reality!

I am not looking forward to my birthday anymore.  Yeah, it’ll just be dinner and whatever else with him.  I’ve cancelled that super tiny gathering with my close friends on Monday.  This is one of the cons to being a mistress, he will never be comfortable amongst your friends.  So to avoid that awkwardness, I’ve cancelled it.  Yeah, so I won’t have a moment with my friends but seriously who cares?  I can have a meet-up with my friends after he leaves.  Dun need a reason for a meet-up session with friends.  I mean, it’s just a freaking birthday and I’m turning twenty-fucking-eight years old.  With my sad life and always living in a fantasy world, deceit and hypocrisy, there really is nothing to celebrate about.  

So it’ll just be dinner on Saturday for me from him.  Once he leaves, it’s back to reality world.  A world of hardness, bitterness and hatred.  My career sucks.  I’ve got kids to support and bills to pay.  I’m earning shit right now.  Not only I’ve taken a 45% paycut with this new job, now the company is slashing staff salary’s by 20%.  Peanuts are what I’ll be bringing home from now on unless I find another well-paying job.  

Rejections are always the same:

1. You are overpaid in your previous job


2. You don’t meet our requirements in terms of education and language


3. I have fresh graduates who are willing to take the job with a small pay

Maybe I should take some pointers from those escorts’ blogs that I’ve been reading.  Hmmm… I mean, I enjoy sex, so why not enjoy it and get paid for it at the same time?  I give good head and I enjoy play-pretends.  Ha ha!  

Anyway.

Life is so fucking short, I’m gonna play hard.
Fuck with all that’s happening around the world or to be precise – around my world.
I dun have any fucking concern anymore.
Whatever happens, let it be!
I dun fucking care anymore, cos I’m turning 28 and this is my fucking new resolution.
I’ll just fucking accept whatever is thrown in my lap and be fucking contented with it, bad or good.

So … HAPPY FUCKING BIRTHDAY TO ME!